You're only 7 Once

Thank you all for your sweet comments and encouragement regarding my struggle that i mentioned earlier.

I do feel better.

I know it's not about the amount of money or things you buy your kids that make them happy, but I do truly enjoy giving them fun memories.  ... things they can look back on and remember good times, happy things or the way they felt at a cerain time.

Bekah's birthday party was great.

All of the girls had an awesome time and i really hope that someday, they will remember the limo ride as they recollect on fun times as a child.


When the limo pulled up in front of our house, Bekah started crying.  It was a sweet moment, because i think she was embarrassed, excited and overwhelmed all at the same time.   It didn't take her long to warm up to the idea and hop in :)

We rode to McDonald's, where all of the kiddos got happy meals to eat on the way there.  We arrived at the pottery shop right on time and had a wonderful party there.  Each of the kids got to paint their own piece of pottery (which i will pick up next week) and they really did a great job of hosting the birthday party.  I was completely impressed. 

All in all - the birthday party was a success.  And I feel like i'm not so bad of a mom; not  because she had a really cool birthday party, but moreso because i helped create a fun memory.

Birthday Party

In keeping with the theme of my entire blog, I am trying to clean off the windshield from the 'bird that pooped' on it yesterday and move on.

Tonight is Bekah's birthday party.  I'm really excited for it too! 

Every other year, we do something outside our house and then, on other years we stay in.  This is her year for something outside of our house, sooooo...

we are going to paint pottery!  Yahoo!

6 of her little girlfriends are meeting at our house tonight and leaving in a limo that will drive us to the pottery place in Carmel.

I'm really excited.  It's the same limo company i used to transport my girl scout troop to  Brown County 3 years in a row (with all that girl scout cookie sale money!) , so they gave me a great deal, and Bekah has been dying to ride in a limo. 

So, I think it will be a fun memory of her 7th birthday.

She knows we are going to paint pottery, but she has no idea that we are taking a limo. 

...and neither do any of her friends.

So anyway, I'm excited for tonight!

Day 3

I have to get something off my chest because it's eating at me. 

I'm a severe people approval addict, at times.  If people don't like me or agree with what I say or rather, think i'm wrong for something.... it literally eats at me.

So, yesterday i posted on my facebook status that the kids needed to go back to school.  Not so much because i am "sick" of them, but more because i still have to get my job done, so I can get paid to support my wonderful children.

I vented.

And you know what?  I meant it!

Snow days are tough.  Whether you want to admit it or not, it throws everyone off schedule.  Now, if i were at home snowed in, where i could enjoy my kids and do something fun and creative, it would be one thing. 

But when i'm trying to manage training on a conference call with two kids in the background.... it's tough.

It's not a cake walk.

And in my opinion, that's ok.

So then, someone posted a negative comment on my status about how sad it is that we can't slow down and enjoy spending time with our kids/families.

Again, i would and I do enjoy spending time with my kids....

When i'm not trying to WORK.


But then, someone else (who has no experience with parenting whatsoever) posted on their own status ....

(let me side step here for a second.  ... Facebook can be so immature.  i can't believe i'm seriously upset/affected by what someone else posted as their status that i don't even really know if it was aimed at me!)

but anyway - i read a status about something like "if you are sick of your kids after 2 snow days, you shouldn't have had kids.... I will never take a little smile for granted.  There are millions of people that can't have kids - you should be lucky you have them.  What an honor."

I guess it just, quite frankly ... pissed me off.

Because I love my kids.

I don't take them for granted.

I know that there are people that can't have kids, but let me tell you right now...

even the best parents in the world that planned their children for YEARS before they were born...

....get frustrated.

They always love their children, but often... don't like them.

And i mean that with all the love in the world.  I truly believe you can love someone and not like them at the moment.

Maybe i"m wrong for that.

I don't know.

But it absolutely goes right through me when someone puts on their status "if you are sick of your kids after 2 days, you shouldn't have had them".

REALLY!?


And i seriously do not know WHY i am so affected by this!  It's ridiculous!  I don't even know that that comment was aimed at me, but it was pretty ironic if it wasn't.

Part of me wants to totally deactivate my entire facebook page because half of the time, the crap on there just makes me mad.

Then, the other half of me needs to accept that people have their own opinions, and what happens in my home is my business, and people dont' have to agree with it.

I guess it just upsets me because I feel like I really do enjoy kids, I think i am pretty good with kids.  I had a freaking girl scout troop for 3 years, i help out in the kids classrooms when they need volunteers.

But again, who am i trying to prove myself to!? 

What is wrong with me!!!!

I'm still not over it, i just want to go out on my front porch and yell at the world (or maybe just those couple of people) ....

I AM A REAL PERSON!  My KIDS GET ON MY NERVES!  YOU TRY WORKING A FULL 8 HOUR DAY AND HAVING YOUR KIDS AROUND! 

DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

That felt good.

People Watching

I love people watching.  Spending time at the airport this week has given me a chance to do a lot of people watching.  I like to sit and speculate what people’s “story” is.  After overhearing several conversations over the past couple of days, here is what I have learned:

          **I don’t like flying on “Embraer” Airplanes.  They are rather small (17 rows) and only have 3 seats across (2 on one side and 1 on the other).  I always end up on this type of plane, every time I go to Guadalajara, and this time, even though I am not in GDL, I am still on one of my most detested planes.  

          I’m not really sure what my real hang up is with these planes, except that they are small.  One time, when I sat next to a pilot, he was telling me that the smaller planes are easier to fly than the bigger ones, but that still doesn’t ease my issues with them. 

          So, anyway – I’ve learned to accept but still not enjoy these airplanes, however I will tell you… if you ever have to choose seats on one, don’t choose seat 1A or 2A.  Those seats are right next to the little “gally” (I think that’s what it’s called – where the flight attendant has all their stuff).  You’re all alone, sitting there, almost as though you’re an overachiever.  Which, clearly I am – but I don’t really like to be viewed as such in front of others.  It made me feel like we were in class and I RAN to the front of the girls line so I could be first.  I felt nerdy.  Anal.  Bored.  And unentertained.  I couldn’t watch anyone in front of me, because the cockpit door was closed.  It’s almost as though they knew I had control issues, so they put me in a padded room.  No one to look at, no one to talk to.  Just there.  In the front of the line.  For 2 and a half hours.

          At one point, I got so bored (A.D.D anyone?) that I headed to the bathroom.  Let me tell you, Embraer aircrafts are NOT hip friendly.  What do I mean by hip friendly?  For those of you who are moms, and have the body to show it… remember back before we had kids.  Those size 5 jeans? Yea, that was when we didn’t have hips.  After the two kids that made a nest in my pelvis for ¾ of a year, my hips are… well … let’s say “proportioned”.  So, back to the bathroom break.   I head back to the bathroom, only to find that, I have to do an “aisle dance” all the way back to the back; turning my hips at a slight angle to fit through. 

          Now, I don’t consider myself “fat”.  I feel like I am a 30 year old mom that has had two kids.  And I’m ok with that.  But not being able to walk straight through the aisle without bumping someone with my “junk” was a bit unnerving.  This is obviously not my fault, the issue lies solely in the hands of the aircraft manufacturer.

          What else have I learned:

          ***I met a girl on my flight from Indy to Houston that looked to be about 22 or so.  She had a 2 year old little girl and a 9 month old little boy.  She didn’t know much about flying and she certainly had her hands full.  She said she was from Muncie, but moving to Jacksonville to be with her family.  I really wondered what her full story was.

          I had a 3 hour layover in Houston, so I helped her get her stuff off the plane (she had to gate check a few things), ate McDonald’s with her and her kids and then walked them to their next gate.  I guess I felt for her because I’d been in her shoes (not literally, with traveling) but young with two kids, alone and virtually at my breaking point 90% of the time.  It felt really good to help her, and I hope she is happy in Jacksonville.

***I learned at the Albuquerque airport that there was a guy and his wife that were flying out of ABQ and headed to Europe, but had to give someone his credit card information before he left.  His wife promptly walked up to him and told him to walk away from the area so people wouldn’t hear him giving his information.  Smart Wife J

***I also learned that there was a doctor (originally, I thought he was a lawyer) dressed in a Mexican Poncho/Coat looking thing that was at a conference here in ABQ.  He was headed to Washington DC for a connecting flight, and may end up stranded there, but luckily he has a lot of friends out there, so finding a place to stay won’t be too difficult.  He attended some sort of a conference where there were Medical Malpractice Lawyers there too and he had a long conversation with a couple of them after the meeting that was “interesting”.  I also learned that he was very proud of several of his colleagues, or maybe residents, I’m not sure – because he called them and told a couple of them how highly the other people at the conference spoke of them.  After hearing his conversation(s) for a while, I grew to be proud of those individuals as well.  HA!

***I learned that my driver from the hotel to the airport retired after 20 years in the Army.  The last 9 of which he spend on “executive detail” with the General, where he traveled 340 out of 365 days of the year.  He spent a couple of weeks at Fort Bragg in North Carolina with The General so they could do “some jumps”.  His son currently lives in Germany with his family and has served in the military for a while as well.  The lady that rode with me to the airport is from Ashville, NC “in the mountains”.  She said last April, President Obama visited a resort in Ashville with his family for vacation.  Several of the roads and surrounding areas were shut down (obviously) and some people saw him golfing at the resort from their homes.  She tried to walk her dog in the area, but secret service made her stop.  The week after Obama left, the local Farmer’s Market began selling items with stickers that said “official Obama cheese, fruit, etc” citing that they had been called by officials before his visit and provided food for him.  She didn’t buy any though, because she thought it was nuts.

New Mexico

Tomorrow morning, I am headed to Rio Rancho, New Mexico for a couple of days.  It should be a whirlwind and rather interesting trip.  I spend a great majority of the day tomorrow flying.... then lead two half day meetings on Wednesday .... and fly home all day Thursday. 

I've never been out west, so I'm not really sure what to expect at all!  A few co-workers told me it's nothing but desert and tumble-weed.  ...it sure beats the Indiana snow!

I actually like to travel for work.  A lot of people will say "oh yuck!" ... but i honestly don't mind.  It's usually great timing, a few days away in a different place, doing different things that do not involve my home office... which is really nice for me.

The preparation is tiring; making sure the kids are packed for the days without me, all laundry is done and packed appropriately, etc.  However...

it is nice for all of us to have a break from the ho-hum routine we have going here and take a break.


I'm truly amazed by technology these days.  (Doesn't that make me sound reallly old?!)

Anyway - i checked in for my flight in the morning and had them send my boarding pass to my email.  Apparently, i can just click the link in my email on my phone and it will bring up a barcode that the gate will scan and that IS my boarding pass.

Who knew!?

The Waffle Box

I love the Peanut Butter and Grape Jelly Uncrustables.  I like them halfway frozen where the peanut butter is still hard. 

Weird, I know.

I could eat a whole box of them in 1 sitting.

There's a lot of things i could eat in one sitting though.  Which is probably why I weigh a great deal more than my driver's license says...

but that's a whole different blog topic.  And we're just not going to go there.

So, back to my extreme obsession adoration of Uncrustables.

I went to the store yesterday, since the kids were in school, but I was off work and got several groceries.

Typically, I tell the kids that the Uncrustables are over priced, because they usually are very pricey for 4 little sandwiches.

...but they are SO GOOD.

So, yesterday, while i was alone - i bought a box.

And i opened it when i got to the car and ate one.

it was SO GOOD.

When I got home, I shoved them in the back of the freezer so the kids wouldn't find them.

I'll admit, I feel a little guilty about it.

...but not guilty enough. 

Because today, I tucked them safely in the bottom of the waffle box.

:)

Yes, I "went there"

Oh Dear Blog Friends...

Tonight... I went there.

I had to.

I knew it was going to be a train wreck. 

But I had to.

My mom brought over my old formal dresses so I could store them in my closet.

And it was like a train wreck.

I just had to try them on.

I knew after 2 kids that they wouldn't fit.  So, i was not laying in my room on the floor crying, believe me.

So, i decided to "surprise" my son with a little "fashion" show.

If i were to say he was amused, i wouldn't do it justice.  I think he was more shocked.  Stunned.  Maybe unconcious.  Probably scared too.

...and scarred.

The first one was a silver sequin dress that had a couple of random (rust?) stains on the front.  Although it looked terrible from the front, it looked even worse from the side, where there was a lot of skin showing and a zipper that would've busted if i tried.....(let's be honest here) ... AT ALL to zip it :)

I moved on to a very, very forgiving velvet dress from my Sophomore Christmas dance.

ohhhh it was lovely, let me tell you.

Chaston said i looked like an old lady from the titanic.

...i guess it was better than a beached whale!