The End of Summer

As this week comes to an end, it marks the near-completion of a few milestones that I'd like to review.  Mostly for my benefit and perhaps for your entertainment as well.

1.) This marks the end of the last full week of summer break.  YAHOO!

  .... Wait, did i say that outloud?  In all seriousness, I am very happy to see the kids going back to school so this house can have some sort of routine back, however I'm also so thankful for this summer because it was the first summer my kids have really built some strong bonds with their friends in the neighborhood. 

 I hope that the many, many, many hours they spent with their friends will stick with them for a long time.

Along with it beign the end of summer break, I did just complete 6 more credit hours towards my degree!  Woot Woot!!  I'm just waiting on my grades to post for the classes I took so I can trot my happy rear end to the scholarship office and get my check for next semester.

Right now, I'm good with taking about 6 credit hours each semester.  I definitely don't want to sacrifice my home life and time with my kids to earn a degree that isn't going to make an immediate impact on my current job/salary/etc - however - definitely want to continue toward the ultimate goal.

I'm taking Macroeconomics and some Business Marketing Class this next semester in addition to working through the Green Belt Certification process at work for Lean Six Sigma.  The next few months should prove to be pretty awesome, considering.

Is it December yet?


2.) This week also marks the end of Summer 2011 Trailer Racing.  Yes, you read it right.  Trailer racing. 

 Let me back up. 

I think i've covered this before, but I have to say... after being raised an only child and (obviously) being a girl... the irony of me raising a little boy has been amusing, to say the least.  In the midst of a summer full of free time and full reign at the closest streets in the neighborhood, my dear son and his friends made up an immitation-racing-phenomenon called "trailer racing", dubbed after the fine Anderson Speedway Trailer Race that they host. 

Only ours was better. 

 It included ropes, strings, yarn, long pieces of anything that would stretch fro their bike seats to an object, or trailer.  Now, this racing extravaganza grew over the summer.  It started with the boys strapping sleds (yes, during our 21+ day heat wave over 90 degrees... my son and his friends were dragging sleds behind their bikes) and ended with strapping virtually anything that could be dragged down the street.  At one point, i saw buckets, laundry soap containers, crates, an old ab roller, etc flying behind the bikes down the street. 

And yes, I said Ab Roller.

You get the drift.

The good news was, all summer, i could hear my son coming down the street based upon what was 'dragging' behind his bike.  The bad news.... my kid looked like he was homeless most of the summer, dragging random things down the street.

But whatever.

So, yea-  i'm equally as sad and happy that The Great Trailer Race Championship Extravaganza 2011 is over for the summer.

3.) This week marks the beginning of 5th Grade Football.  And yes, I'm the proud owner of a 5th grader.  What the heck!?  Where has time gone?

Anyway.... the last two years, Chas was on the Green Bay Packers Team.  Now that he's moved up to 5th Grade, he's on the Buffalo Bills. 

So, naturally, I needed a Buffalo Bills t-shirt.  (I cannot ring the cow-bell without being properly dressed in my fan-attire).  So, obviously, it's a bit difficult to track down a Bills t-shirt here in Colts Country, so I hit the net.  And found a cute little vintage Buffalo Bills T-shirt!  Total Win!  I'm already trying to figure out a cute team snack item I can make to go along with the Bills.  I've always got the back-up cocoa krispie football-shaped treats I made last year, but would love to find something more 'team' appropriate. 

Wonder what the team would think if i brought all of my "bills" and handed them out.  Electric Bill to #23, Insurance Bill to #15, Cable Bill to #55, Mortgage to the Coach, etc :)

...it was worth a try.


4.) This week wil be taking me to Holiday World for the first time!  I'm super excited to be headed there with the kids and a couple of other special people... before school starts.  Although it will be a busy day, it will be nice to get away from my house for a couple of days and enjoy the company. 

And I'm wondering... in honor of our departure to Holiday World... perhaps our dear friend Elfis will make a return visit to our house.  He hasn't been back for quite some time... and with Christmas coming up in 4 months, it seems like an appropriate time to start terrorizing getting the kids acclimated to his arrival.

Moohahahah.


5.) Ah yes, this week will end with my birthday.  The big three one.  I am no longer thirty.  But thirty one. 

I am now 'experienced' at my thirties.

Does this mean I'm really a grown-up?  I mean, as if the pre-pubescent trailer-racing champion wasn't enough indication that i'm a grown-up... now i have to turn another year older!?

Instead of referring to it as 'older', i think i will stick with 'seasoned'.  You know, i've just been marinating for the last 31 years, right?  At some point, I'll be well cooked and ready to be stolen like a piece of meat.

Well, maybe not.  I don't think my analogy worked out the way I wanted it to, but who cares. 


6.) Speaking of seasoned... while my favorite Buffalo Bill (is he literally a "bill"?  I don't know the correct term here for the players, but whatever... i think i'm in a 'oh look, something shiny' mood tonight.  and judging from the fact that it's 2 am and i'm still wide awake, i think that's confirmation of my 'shiny' mood)... so where was I. 

Ah yes, while my favorite little Buffalo Bill was at practice tonight, I had a photo appointment with the cutest little girl from Ft. Wayne.  After I took her birthday pictures, I headed over to my sweet friend's house, where he had cooked me a YUMMY steak dinner with peas and corn for my birthday.  It was delicious.  And so friggen great to walk in and be fed good food that I didn't cook!  

Don't worry folks, I'm not going to get used to such behavior and 'spoiling'.. but damn it... it was good.  And such a delightful surprise.  I'm a happy girl.

...just like the fun little leopard file organizer purse and card that Eve left on my door yesterday, after I'd had a TOTALLY crappy day. (Thanks Eve!!!)



After a super crappy couple of days, it's amazing what a few of my dearest friends can do to totally turn my mood around.  I just really feel like gathering all of my favorite people into one room and giving a big giant group hug.


Life is good.

Hitched

I am finishing up on editing pictures from my 6th wedding this season.  Here are a few things that I've learned from the 2011 wedding season thus far:

1.) Pink and Orange seem to be the popular color.  Luckily, brides have been using the colors as "accent" colors instead of bridesmaid dress colors.  While I'm ok with this color combination, I'm kinda tired of seeing it. 

2.) The average ceremony from the time the bride walks down the aisle to the time she walks out with her husband is about 20 minutes.  By the time the bride walks down the aisle, I've usually spent a good 6 hours with her.  .... preparing for 20 minutes of vows.  

3.) After the ceremony, guests arrive at the reception and eat.  A lot of food.  That i'm sure - is very expensive.  I've yet to attend a wedding this season where a large meal wasn't served.  I'm thankful, because I get to eat some YUMMY food after a long day.  But good grief, that has to be expensive!

4.)If.  And this is a BIG Giant IF.... I ever get my "happily ever after" that i've been waiting for, for so long.. I want to run away and have a simple wedding on the beach.  Honeymoon built in and come back to start our new life together.   I am not spending all of that money to entertain people for a few hour and celebrate my wedding.  I'd rather run off to the beach  and just do it simply!  Don't get me wrong.  I'm all for big weddings ... love attending.  But do NOT want to even think about the bill!  :)

It's Not Like A Pair of Shoes

For those who know me well, you've inevitably heard about the struggles that I've had in my life, been there to help me through them or supported me after the fact of the matter.  At the time, our struggles seem so huge compared to all that is around us - but once it all calms down and "blows over" so to speak, it's easier to understand perhaps 'why' those struggles occurred.

Easy for me to say now, since things have been pretty smooth sailing for a while... knock on wood.

However, there are a handful of people around me that are really struggling with various things.  And it breaks my heart.

It's simple to say "oh, it's for the best."  or  "everything happens for a reason."  or "you'll get through it."  But when you're in the middle of what feels like hell on Earth, it's not easy to hear those words and even harder to actually believe them.

Most of you know that I'm a person of Faith. 

....and believe me... I've struggled with it at times.  It's not easy to believe in something you cannot see or touch.  And even more so, to believe in something 'good' when everything feels so bad.

And i'm not here to tell you that I'm perfect.  Because I'm pretty sure I'm the furthest thing from it.

But I try.

When I think about the hard times in life, the only thing that has brought me through those times is believing that it is happening for a reason, and that someday I will figure out why everything happened the way it did. 

The older I get, the better I become at accepting that fact and then waiting for the 'vision' of why it happened as it did.

But in the middle of the storm, it's so hard to see the horizon ahead.




I was talking with a dear friend of mine recently.  A fellow single-mother who has raised her children on her own since they were babies.  A woman of such a great deal of Faith that she could move mountains if she believed it enough... and a person that I view as a mentor when I need lifted up.

We were chatting about how things have worked out lately in my life and how thankful I am for everything.  And how she's going through a rough spot right now with things.  She mentioned that the message at her church the previous Sunday was meant for her to hear.  When she says that, I know it's going to be good - so I asked.

All she said was,

"Faith isn't something you put on and take off like a pair of shoes.  Faith is to be worn at all times."


It didn't really touch me at the time, but I thought about it as the day went on.  And it was so right.

Faith absolutely isn't something you're supposed to take off and on like a pair of shoes.  It's easy to want to do that, but that's not the intention of Faith.

If you believe in a higher power, you know that Faith is believing that if God delivered the situation, or circumstances it is because it is supposed to be that way for now and it will pass.

For me, that was a really hard thing to do many times and I know that many of you have either been there or are there right now.  And if you're really honest with yourselves, you can probably identify some moments in your life that were really crappy.... but looking back... had to occur in order to get you to the next big thing.

There have been many times when I just wanted to leave my Faith on the proverbial front porch and believe that the world was against me and that I was never going to find real happiness.   Like the name of my blog, I try not to look into the rearview mirror too much, in order to keep my eyes on what lies ahead - but I haven't lost touch with what's behind.

I think all that is behind us on that long and winding road does more than bring us to where we are today; but rather makes us WHO we are today.  There are things back there that gave us badges of honor... and things that left deep bruises.  There are things we wish we hadn't have learned... and things that taught us more than any degree.  People that traveled with us on the road for a little while, then turned off to a different path. 

You get my drift.

I'm thankful because things are going alright for me right now.  Even if things don't stay the way they are forever, I'm grateful for what "is" at this moment... and hopeful for what 'will be'.    And I have a sense of peace about the fact that, my Faith isn't removable and everything is as it should be in this moment.

...however long this 'moment' in time lasts, I'm going to enjoy for the duration.

Concert

I've always been one to think about what my kids will remember from childhood.  I don't want them to look back and wish it were too different, although I know there will be times like that.  But for the most part, I try to conciously balance between the good and the bad.  There is disclipline, but there is also fun.  And that's something that I try to really maintain.

Since it's summer, I work from home and have pretty much disrespected any form of schedule that believed it belonged in my house ... my kids are enjoying the time they've been spending with their neighborhood friends.   And I'm happy to oblige. 

My philosophy: "They're only young once."

Right?

They balance their days and nights between my house and their friends' houses that are each within walking distance from our home.  Their friends have great parents and I can certainly trust that they are being taken care of.

Back to the story.


We've started a new tradition this summer, and I have to tell you, as obnoxious as it may seem, every time we do it, it makes me think of how I really hope my kids remember these moments when they are grown.

I've spent a great deal of the summer with my kids and their two friends.  Count 'em folks... FOUR kids.

Thank goodness they are good kids.  :)

So, we roll all the windows down on Francine (my car) and turn the CD up literally as loud as it will go.

Bekah usually plays air guitar, her friend Jordan sits in the back with her singing and laughing.  Chas and Nick will sing along too, dancing and doing arm motions to accompany their infamous moves.

We call it the "car concert".

Alright, don't grade me on creativity, because after spending the summer with 4+ kids every day, my intelligence, maturity and creativity are lacking.

Don't judge.

So, back to the concert.  My favorite part comes at the end of the song, where as the song volume dereases with the final notes, we all start screaming and clapping like we're at a concert.

Some would argue that our actions are insane.

..and i'd have to agree.

but it's fun.  And that's what memories are made of, right?


So tonight, all four kids crashed at the "five oh eight" (that's what i call my house, due to the numericals in my address for those that don't understand).  I had recorded the CMT top 20 video countdown earlier this morning and decided I wanted to watch it.

That simple act turned into a a wild event that included numeous clothing changes and in one case, the boys dressed in dresses and cowboy hats.

I won't expand on that one.

The best part was that we only had 1 cowboy hat.  That's kind of a problem with 4 kids.

Thankfully their creativity came into play rather quickly and devised a plan of improvision where they would be able to wear 'any' hat in the house to the concert.  We had a pink and blue sombrero, a full pink and blue indian headdress and then the old faithful pink cowboy hat.

The fast songs would include dancing, jumping around, clapping, and just overall concert-ish moves that you would expect at a full country concert. 

Not in my living room.

but whatever.  My sanity was already gone.

We spent a good hour or more laughing, singing and having a really fun time.   The kids were all happy and playing together perfectly.

Although my kids are still young, I know the days are numbered and the opportunity to make fun memories like that will dissipate in the future.  I won't lie there are certainly days when I want to find some island far, far away where there are only good friends, good food and a good man (only when I want him! hah!)... but tonight was a night where I realized....

...there's no place like home.

...there's no sound greater than children laughing.

...there's no where else I'd rather have been.

Life is good.

Cheater

After working at JCPenney in high school and college and then working there for several years when I thought I was going to get laid off from HP several years ago, I kinda grew to love the JCP. 

Mostly beacuse they were always so good to me.  They paid me well (for part time work) - were ready to invest in me from a growth perspective when I was worried my future with HP was limited and most of all, always worked around my schedule, especially when it came to my school functions, my kids and my 'real' job.

JCP was like an outlet.  I hated working at HP all day and then heading to JCP at night, but it was a different kind of work and I liked it.  I was able to see and talk to many different people, help out with their shopping, give them good deals on sales and just generally work with the public.

When my career stabilized again after many workforce transformations and my photography hobby picked up, I was able to let go of JCP from a financial provider perspective and depend on them only to shop.

...and maybe when my JCP bill was equal to the money I was making there during work, I might have realized that I didn't really depend on the money for anything other than to support a really, really bad habit I had picked up....

Clearance Shopping.

But nonetheless, JCP was always good to me and at times, I still miss working for her.

But I'm a grown up.  With kids.  I don't need to be working retail hours unless I absolutely have to.

I've always shopped there though.  Probably because I knew the floor plan inside and out.  And maybe because I just 'knew' how to work the sales to my advantage. 

Here lately, I've been feeling really guilty because  - - - -





... I've been cheating on JCP with Kohl's.



I know, it might sound trivial.  Because Kohl's is pretty much JCP's biggest competition from a product and sales perspective.  But it's a stupidly big deal to me.

I guess it all started when I moved to my house and was about 10 minutes from Kohl's.  Or maybe I ran across a really good deal on something there and decided to go back again.

And again

and again

and...

you get the drift.

So whatever.

This weekend, I finally reached a point in the proverbial relationship with Kohl's that it was time to come out and just admit it.

What prompted this turning point?

Hold on to your hat, because this is pretty absurd good.

If any of you (ladies ... I know there are a couple of men that read this) - so any of you ladies are big busted, you will know that strapless bras are absolutely NOT our friends.

Don't even try to ACT like a strapless bra fits you like it did in high school because I am here to tell you that it doesn't.  It just doesn't. 

One of two things happens:

1. - whatever outfit you are wearing that requires a strapless bra literally drums up vocal chords and says, "hello world... the GIRLS HAVE ARRIVED!"  and you end up looking like a ridiculous hooker that's trying to show off her assets.

2. - the strapless bra itself grows vocal chords and says, "look, it's just too much, we can't support all of this."  And it ends up stupidly uncomfortable to the point where you just wish you would've worn a sweatshirt and called it a day.


So, back to the story.

I was wandering around Kohl's and saw what appeared to be some letters on the tag of a brassier that appeared to have a heavenly glow around it as though God himself sent this brassier to directly to me.

(oh, how He answers prayers...)

"strapless minimizer"

What?  A strapless minimizer.  Because of comfortability (certainly not style, but definitely comfortability), I always purchase minimizers.

But now... a strapless minimizer.

That sealed the deal.

Kohl's was my new love.

And away I went.... minimizer in tow.

... and we are living happily ever after.

What the World is Missing...

What the world is missing is good old-fashioned letters.

Yep, the kind that you write to people you care about to say hello, update them on what's going on in your life and just take a moment out of your day to generally sit down and "pen" a note to someone.

I don't know about you, but getting the mail every day is so ho-hum.  Which bill will I get?  What piece of junk mail will come today?

My sweet girl's cousin just took a vacation to Pigeon Forge and promised to send her a postcard or letter.

...and we have been waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting for the letter to arrive.

Every day, she's at the mailbox waiting.

And I think that innocence is just so sweet, and genuine.

Sometimes I wonder what it must've been like back when people had loved ones overseas at war and the only mechanism for communication was via letter.  How sweet that would've been to receive a letter from your son, husband, nephew, brother, etc.

So, I wonder ... fellow blog readers... should we start a little letter campaign!?  Just for funsies!?!

My Life as a Sitcom

I always dreamed of the fairy tale life... boy meets girl, they get married, have 4 kids, a nice big house and live happily ever after.

And you know, if a couple of screenwriters were looking for a sweet gig, they could certainly document my life... I mean, it's definitely a tale of boy meets girl, they have a kid and life goes on.

...except my version has a few extra episodes.

Let's just look back from a 'love life' perspective.  And honestly, laugh with me if you will.

So, it's te classic tale of a girl and a boy dating in high school, he goes off to college, parties too much for the prudish girl to handle and she moves on.

And meets another boy, they date for a year she comes home from college on Christmas break and a month later learns about the sweetest Christmas gift that would keep on giving for years and years and years.  9 months later, the baby was born and life went on.

The next episode features the girl moving out on her own with the toddler boy because things in the relationship couldn't continue. 

A couple of years later girl meets another boy, makes a not so smart decision and ends up with a baby girl.

Just the kind of romantic comedy you were dreaming of, eh!?

So fast forward about eight years.

Same sweet girl, raising those sweet little children.

Fast forward to yesterday.

I'm trying to teach my almost-11-year-old-son to mow the yard.  Not only to help me out, but also because it could certainly earn him some money, mowing for family and potentially older neighbors in the neighborhood.  

Lucky for me, he has been hanging around a slightly older 12 year old friend who understands the importance of helping out and encourages him to do his part.

So, yesterday he decided he was going to help me by push mowing the yard.  We have a riding mower, but he doesn't quite weigh enough to keep it running, so he pushes the other mower.

And because he was trying to be extremely helpful, he went ahead and lowered the mower deck to the 1st notch.

I'm not quite  sure if he mowed the lawn or the actual Earth below it, but my grass is definitely shorter.  God love him.  and the area around my landscaping is still the old height.  Not only because we don't own a weed-eater, but also because he wasn't exactly the most precise in his route around the yard.

But hey, the grass is mowed, right?

...annnnnnnd I probably won't have to mow again until next year :)


Just kidding, kinda.


By last night, he and his friend Nick were worn out from mowing and swimming all afternoon and evening and decided to go to Nick's house down the street for a bonfire.  The plan was for both boys to return to my house and spend the night.

...they rolled in around about 11pm, when the bonfire at Nick's was over... cell phone in hand.

Now, I have to tell you...

I am having a hard time with my son growing up.

Hard time like... searching for body hair in hopes of not finding any and knowing that when I do, undoubtedly, a tear will be shed.

Because that will be confirmation that my sweet, sweet baby is growing up.

(so far, no body hair yet).

I try to play it cool when it comes to chicks ladies hotties girls... because I want him to feel like he can talk to me about stuff. 


..even though we all know that when some chick girl breaks his heart, imma make sure she knows who da boss is I am there to help mend his little broken heart.

To the point, the boys roll in to the five-oh-eight about 11 last night, cell phone in hand. 

..texting  the enemy girls.

Apparently, one of the little girls said she likes "guys with long hair".  Naturally,  since my son's hair is shaggy.... he went in the bathroom, got his teeth all brushed, his hair all combed to the side like it is supposed to look, got his phiton necklace on and was ready for his cellular photo debut to some hormone filled girl that was about to view my son like a piece of meat.

Oh hell no!

But I played along.  I acted like it didn't break my heart that he was trying to impress another girl.

I didn't let him out of my room without telling him that he's absolutely not allowed to kiss girls until he's 30.  And i'm pretty sure the look he gave me was one that would say, "Don't go there, mom."

But regardless, I played it cool, asking what the girls wrote back.   To be honest i was torn.  I didn't necessarily want them to say he was "hot", because seriously, that's my baby.

But if they said he was ugly.... I'd have to put the smack down, because seriously, that's MY baby.

Luckily, Nick's phone died before they were able to ask much more than how old my baby he was.

Not really sure how I'm going to handle it when boys start talking to my little girl.

It just might be enough to drive me to drink.

...and I don't drink.